RockStars.

As this scary world of college is quickly approaching, my heart is excited and yet terrified.  Excited for the opportunity and blessing it is to get an education and to begin to be independent. Terrified of the unknown and of leaving the only town, family, friends, and church Ive ever known.

But you know what? Im okay.

No matter how big and unrealistic my dreams seem to me right now, I am 100% trusting that God will put me where He wants me. If He doesn't want me to go to UCLA, then so be it, I won't. If he wants me to be a missionary, then Lord give me the courage to go.

But through all of this, my hope is that my faith and trust will not waver, because I know that He is walking me through all this. Even when I break down in the middle of writing my personal statements with trembling hands, I know that He is taking care of me and giving me the strength to continue. Even when Ive taken the ACT three times and still haven't gotten the score that I need, He's there; softly and gently, reminding me to let go of the path I have planned for my life and to start letting him guide me in His direction.

So thank you Lord.

Thank you for reminding me that it's all gonna be okay.

Resting in His Joy

These past couple of weeks have been some of the most memorable weeks of my life, good and bad. From heartache, to laughter beyond measure, the Lord is slowly opening my heart to living a life full of abandonment.

Through everything, He has given me this inexpressible joy.

A joy that makes me want to sing at the top of my lungs when any song is played on the radio.

A joy that makes me want to dance in the waves of the ocean with my friends on a sunny day.

And a joy that pushes me to live life to the fullest no matter what the circumstances are.

Never have I wanted to pursue the life the Lord has for me more than this summer. Yeah, I'm still making stupid mistakes (ask my parents) but something in me is taking root. Something is pushing and prodding me into becoming a girl who is passionate about her Savior and who wants to tell everyone about His immense, powerful love.

So here I sit, typing on my bedroom floor, barely being able to contain a smile, because I know that I am resting in a joy that far outweighs them all.

And knowing that, ladies and gentlemen makes all the difference.

An Endless Overflow Of Gifts

As I heaved my overstuffed suitcase out of the car and hiked my way up the hill to the tent, I had no idea what God had in store for me that week. My little, nervous self didn't realize that God would reveal the magnitude of His love and the overwhelming truth of his promises to me in just five days. But He did. And it was incredible. 

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Camp Alandale changed my heart. With the purpose of providing a safe, reliable camp for abused foster care children while continually showering them with the Lord's love and grace was amazing to me. To see them light up when you gave them a compliment, or the tears they cried as they shared their stories, was so powerful. You could just feel the walls and lies of the devil being broken in them as the truth of the Lord began to shape and reform their hearts.

But they weren't the only ones affected that week. I got the privilege of being a junior counselor which means my job was to serve, play and be there for the campers. I cooked, cleaned, sang, hugged, joked, danced, and cried with the kiddos who quickly found a nice little place in my heart.  Every day, us junior counselors were able to spend time in God's word and the more I read, the more I never wanted to put it down. I experienced the abundance of peace and pure joy that came from seeking the Lord and was moved like never before to keep advancing His kingdom.

I was able to bask in even the small things He has provided for me in my life and to remember that I am free. I am free from the mistakes I made five years ago and the mistakes I will make in the next hour. I am free from thinking I will never be good enough. I am free from the pressure of this culture and am free to start living into the joy and love and grace and peace that Christ wanted me to have all along. 

As we read a devotion by Charles Spurgeon, this quote stuck at to me saying, "Why shouldn't every year be richer than the past, in love, and usefulness, and joy?" 

And I thought to myself, "He's right, why shouldn't it?" 

So I'm done being mundane.

I'm done saying, "Well I'm an okay Christian, I do good things, and I don't get in trouble...isn't that enough?" 

No. 

So here I am, ready for whatever the Lord wants for my life, and resting in his endless overflow of grace, peace, joy, love, and freedom.